Has anyone else heard on the radio or TV commercial about this “technique” you can purchase that promises to change your kids’ attitude or “your money back”? I find this whole idea skeptical. If someone really had the magic cure to treating bad attitudes, do you think they’d advertise it on late night TV? On the other hand, if they really do produce what they claim then I’m all in! I wish I could change K’s attitude as easily as I can change the TV channel.
She got herself all worked up last night because I asked M to turn off the show we were trying to watch because I couldn’t hear it over the kitchen faucet. I couldn’t turn off the faucet because K was washing a pan or something. I walked over to her to put my glass in the dishwasher and she said under her breath, in her typical snotty attitude, “Because it’s always my fault.” I’ll stop you from asking right now – no I didn’t smack her. Would I have liked to just smack her face for her attitude and disrespect? Of course, however I didn’t because I honestly didn’t think I’d have been able to stop. It doesn’t matter what you say to that girl, she automatically takes a defensive stance no matter what.
You could tell her that she can’t start a load of laundry right this moment because so-and-so is in the shower, and K’s reply would be “It’s always me who can’t do what I’m supposed to do!!” Or my personal favorite “You told me to start my laundry, pick up my sweatshirt, and put my shoes away! Now you’re saying not to do it! MAKE UP YOUR MIND! WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO?!?!” Never mind the fact that if she’d pick up her sweatshirt and put her shoes away first, by the time she was ready to start the laundry so-and-so would be finished in the shower.
The other thing that drives me bonkers and makes me want to shake her is when I ask her to do something and she stays exactly where she is and doesn’t reply. Then I get angry and tell her again only louder. Her reply is “I’M GOING!! GOD!! WHY DO YOU HAVE TO TELL ME FIFTEEN TIMES?!” It really irritates me when I ask her do something and instead of getting up and doing it, she slithers off the couch then plays with the dog for a minute, then watches TV for another minute, then saunters over to whatever it is I asked her to do. I know that I’ve allowed this to manifest. I take responsibility for the fact that I didn’t instill in them at a young age that when I ask them to do something – they do it.
However, I will say that I’ve been told by numerous people on numerous occasions that my children are very well behaved. Which, let’s face it, who doesn’t like to hear that? It solidifies my belief that I haven’t completely screwed up. If they can behave like decent, polite, normal human beings in public then I’ve done something right. I just need to figure out how to get K to stop being so… lazy is the word that comes to mind.
My brother, EJ (who has no children so it kind of irritates me when he does this) but EJ will observe something between K and I, and he’ll turn to me and say “Are you going to take that?” Yes, EJ, I am going to take it. Here I will take it when I’m out in public and don’t feel like getting arrested for child abuse, I will take it. But I sometimes wonder if I don’t “take it” at home too. I don’t smack my kids. On a rare occasion I have but not often. I wasn’t a spanker either. Again, on rare occasions I did, but not often. However, I’m beginning to really wonder if what K needs is one good beating. I sometimes wonder if I started smacking their mouth every time they got snotty, or they yelled at me for bullshit like K does, if they’d eventually knock it off.
On the other hand, I wonder if they’d end up at the school social worker claiming child abuse….
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