Crazy Grandparents

I can’t remember if I’ve ever mentioned my intense hatred of my ex-in-laws or not.  I’m pretty sure that I have but to be honest I’m too lazy to go back through all my posts to see if I have or not.  Since I’m so very fond of “background” info here’s a little snippet.  (If you’re already aware of my issues with them feel free to skip the next paragraph.)

I wasn’t a fan of my in-laws when I was married to SFB (Shit For Brains) and that hasn’t changed with time.  To make a very long story short – they made my life HELL when I was married to their son/brother and thought that they could keep up the game when I divorced his ass.  With the divorce I re-grew the backbone he had managed to verbally remove over the course of 4 years and have told the ex-in-laws numerous times where they can go.  I have even had to take my ex-MIL to task for disrespecting me in front of my children when they were with her.  Simply put – I’m not a fan of them.

M has always stayed out of any argument/issue with the ex-in-laws.  The way he views it, unless they’re physically or verbally abusing either me or the girls he has no right to get in the middle of any of it as it doesn’t concern him.  He’s not a fan of them either; he just keeps out of it.

That was, until Saturday!

Li and Ki went to a pumpkin patch with their Dad’s family on Saturday.  While they were gone I got a text message from Ki asking if I was planning on telling her Dad’s family that I was pregnant.  I told her no and asked her why.  Apparently, Barb (ex-MIL) was very upset that I didn’t have the decency to tell her myself that I was pregnant and that she thought I had more class than that, and that I should have told her rather than letting the girls tell her.

Excuse me?  Since when is my personal business ANY of her business?!

I told M and holy shit did he get PISSED.  He was livid.  He immediately texted Ki and told her to let her Grandma know that we wanted to talk to her when she dropped off the girls. 

The girls came home and M was standing on the porch waiting.  He made sure they were inside before he headed to the car.  I can’t remember word for word what he said to Barb, but it was basically that he’s stood by and witnessed her ignorance for 5 years and he’s kept quiet, however, now that she’s starting in on something that’s HIS she’d be smart to keep her mouth shut. 

It was much more colorful though.  And it made me happy.  Very happy to see her go pale as he talked to her, knowing that this conversation with M was NOT what she was expecting to receive.

I naively thought that would be that.  Of course I was wrong!!

Ki got a phone call from her Dad.  Apparently Barb got home and had a panic attack from being “viciously and verbally abused” by “that man”.  (This is another thing of hers that I’ve witnessed several times during the course of my marriage to her son – when she’s trying to start shit and people don’t believe her, she suddenly has a panic attack and has to go to the hospital.  I think it’s a way of getting attention and getting people to stop focusing on how wrong she is about whatever she was starting.  Not only that, but her panic attack conveniently waited 45 minutes until she got home and didn’t happen immediately after the conversation.) 

Ki put the phone down in the other room and told me what her Dad said.  I picked up the phone and informed him that I didn’t give a shit about his mother when I was married to him, and I sure as hell don’t give a shit about her now.   She can have as many panic attacks as she wants the fact remains that she crossed a line and has effectively fucked herself.  I also informed him that his family is no longer allowed on my property, nor are they allowed to be calling my home.  If they want communication with the girls it must be done through him and only him.

To which he threatened to take me to court so I laughed, very hard, and told him I dare him to take me into a court of law.  I offered to bring the paperwork showing he’s $70K behind in child support, doesn’t see them unless it’s convenient for him, has – for all intents and purposes – abandoned his children, and will counter his court threat with my own of having a warrant issued for his arrest; which has been completely within my legal right to do so once he hit $5K behind in child support.

(Neither Ki nor Li was around to hear this conversation.  I had moved out to the garage and M took both kids and both dogs out for a walk.)

He was less than eager after that to pursue court action.  I do think, however, that I need to look into Grandparent Laws in Illinois.  I have a feeling that will be my next battle.

The crazy in that family has reached an entirely new level...

*I hope that people don’t think I want to keep my children from their family.  That’s not the case, but I also don’t think it’s necessary for them to be subjected to this shit every time they see them.  It’s not healthy and it’s not right.

**Also note that I didn’t say that his family couldn’t see the girls.  I’m taking the responsibility off of me and putting it on him where it belongs.  I don’t require him to arrange visits with my family.  Why should it be my responsibility to arrange visits with his family?  He’s perfectly capable; just lazy.