Done

I'm fucking done.  I'm done with my job.  I'm tired of being in this position.  I'm tired of being the last to be able to do ANYTHING.  Yea, I get it.  I'm the "secretary" and therefore I'm no one, but I'm fucking done.  Take today for example. 

Craig asked me to look up some cut sheets on some hardware he's getting pricing on.  Of course he says "if you have time" which is a bunch of bullshit.  I'm in the middle of organizing 15 + years of files that have just been crammed into various file cabinets.  I've been working on this for 4 days.  I'm only 1/2 way through, if that.  The hardware he wanted me to look up was 3 pages of hardware.  Of course, I have to say "Sure!" Like I'm oh so thrilled to be looking up hardware cut sheets. 

It took me 2 hours to look up the hardware.  Know why?  Because I have no idea what I'm looking up!  Yes, I know what a closer is.  I know what a rim cylinder is.  I know what a push/pull bar is.  What I don't know is what the difference is between a 4011 and a 4010 closer.  I was looking at these different closers and I had no idea which one he needed.  I did the best I could.  I printed out what I could clearly tell was what he was looking for and marked the ones I couldn't find.  Guess what?  I got "talked to" about paying attention to what I was doing.  Apparently I printed the same cut sheet three times.  HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT A 4011 AND A 4010 CLOSER ARE "THE SAME THING"?!  He forgets that I don't have anything to do with that part of this company.  I don't deal with those things everyday.  I'm a "Secretary" and that's all. 

I'm also sick of not eating lunch.  11:30 am is too early for me to eat.  I'm not hungry then.  Noon is ideal, but I'm always the last allowed to eat.  Sorry, but 1:30 is too late for me to eat!  If I eat lunch at 1:30 I'm not hungry for dinner, yet I still have to make it for those in my house who are hungry for dinner.  Ron leaves at Noon and even though we're only allowed a 30 minute lunch, he manages to always have an hour lunch.  Craig leaves whenever he wants and bitches about "I was at a jobsite this morning at 5:30 am.  I need to eat lunch."  Waaahh.   I call BULLSHIT!  H tells me all the time about how he always picks up McDonald's on the way back to the office and eats in his car.  He expects me to believe that if he WAS at a jobsite at 5:30 this morning, which I don't believe for a minute, that he didn't stop and get something to eat?  Again - bullshit.

And I know he wasn't at the jobsite at 5:30 this morning.  He was there at 7.  I know this because Brian was in the office yesterday picking up checks and a laser that Craig borrowed from him last week.  Before Brian left he said something to Craig about meeting at the jobsite at 7 am today, and jokingly asked Craig if he wanted a wake up call.  That's because Craig is always late to meetings that early in the morning.  Because Craig never shows up before 8:30 in the office (we start the day at 8 am) it's a running joke that Craig is still sleeping at 8.  When he has "meetings" in the middle of the day we all joke that if you called him on his cell, you'd hear Katelin or his dog in the background.  Yet I can't say anything because Craig can do no wrong as far as the boss is concerned.

I guess I'm just pissed today that I've been trying to organize all this stuff in the office, I'm printing info for Craig (which is really part of his job), trying to fix the fax machine, printing 348 pages of info from a CD, and I just want to go get lunch, but I can't.  I don't even stay out 30 minutes.  I get a sandwich from the 7-11 around the corner and bring it back to the office.  I then eat at my desk while I'll answer phones, type out PO's, file "urgent" stuff... I don't really "take a lunch" and the fact that on days when I'm hungry and just want to go grab something to eat - I have to wait.  Because I'm the last on the list for everything.

As I type this, Ron has been out of the office on "lunch" for 45 minutes, and Craig has been gone 30.  I'm locking the doors and going to get lunch.